Week 2
Let's try that again...
Sunday, Sept. 17
BALTIMORE 11½ Oakland 34 - 11.5 is a big spread, but Baltimore absolutely dismantled a supposedly good Bucs team last week, and the Raiders just looked lost. There was one play, early in their shutout loss to SD, where Art Shell was yakking with Randy Moss on the bench, and Moss had to point to the field to remind Shell that we was still coaching a football team. Give the points.
INDIANAPOLIS 13 Houston 47 - 13 is another big spread, but the Colts at home are a pretty tough matchup. They have some fatal flaws (like the running game) but none that Houston will be able to exploit. Give more points.
CINCINNATI 10 Cleveland 42 - And here we go again - 10 points in week two? The Browns will get better every week, as RAC's coaching takes hold, Willie's leadership makes a difference, and Frye gets more comfortable in his role. Take the points and the Brownies, but Cincy still wins.
MIAMI 6½ Buffalo 37 - Buffalo looked good on the road last week, and Miami looked dreadful against Charlie "Football Magic" Batch. I'd like to get a whole TD here, but I'll settle for 6.5 and take the Bills.
CHICAGO 9 Detroit 32 - Can Chicago's offense score 9? Detroit held their own with Seattle last week, but now they're on the road. I think there are some over-reactions in these high spreads, so I'll take the points again with the Lions.
Carolina 1 MINNESOTA 37½ - But here's the other side of the coin. One point for Carolina? Everybody's Super Bowl darling? Give me the Panthers.
PHILADELPHIA 3 N.Y. Giants 41½ - Can Philly do it against a good team? I thought the Jints looked good last week and had some bad officiating help out the wrong Manning. Philly has trouble at RB and WR. I'll take the FG and the Jints.
ATLANTA 5½ Tampa Bay 35½ - Is Tampa as bad as they played last week? That's what the bookies are asking with the line - between a TD and a FG. I'll give the 5.5 and take the Falcons at home because I think they're handling Vick better, and their D is improved.
New Orleans 2½ GREEN BAY 37½ - The Aints favoured at Lambeau? There has to be something deeply wrong with this picture. Yes, the Pack is a Division II team right now, and the frozen tundra isn't what it once was. Still. I'll take the 2.5 point - having absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Favre and Ahman Green are both on my fantasy team.
St. Louis 3 SAN FRANCISCO 43½ - I think this line is too small - thwe Rams will be better this year. The 49rs showed some offense against the Cards, but it won't be enough against the Rams D which should be solid.
SEATTLE 7 Arizona 47 - The Cards are improved for sure, and will continue to get better. Dennis Green is a for-real coach and Arizona is turning into Minnesota West. But Seattle is the defending conference champ for a reason, and they're home in rainy Seattle, so I'm willing to give the TD and take the Hawks at home.
NEW ENGLAND 6 N.Y. JETS 37 - Pats in a romp. Belichick shows Mangini how it's done. And when the other coaches get this game tape, they'll know exactly how to stop Pennington & Co.
SAN DIEGO 11 Tennessee 38 - Yet another double digit line. But for San Diego at home, it's warranted. Give the 11 and take the Bolts.
DENVER 10½ Kansas City 39½ - Yee gads - 10.5 points for the Donkeys? What madness is this? Herm Edwards must have done something seriously wrong. It may be that the New York betting dollars want to go against KC because Herm stabbed them in the back. Still, the line is too high - take the points and KC to cover, but the Donkeys will win.
Of course, I stu[pidly forgot that professional manequin Todd Collins will be starting at QB for KC after Trent Green got aced last week. Duh. I might still take the 10.5 and see if Harm can rally the troops.
DALLAS 6 Washington 36½ - There are a lot of people on both teams' bandwagons, which mean a lot of people will be let down. I think the Tuna is not happy with his whole situation now - Jerry Jones got a bag of TO groceries without Bill's consent. Both teams look very 8-8 to me. But Washington loves to spoil the party at Texas Stadium, so I'll take 6 and Washington.
Monday, Sept. 18
JACKSONVILLE 1 Pittsburgh 36½ - Jax sure looked good against Dallas, and the Steelers weren't too convincing on opening night. Without the big Doofus at QB, take Jax and sacrifice the point.
Sunday, Sept. 17
BALTIMORE 11½ Oakland 34 - 11.5 is a big spread, but Baltimore absolutely dismantled a supposedly good Bucs team last week, and the Raiders just looked lost. There was one play, early in their shutout loss to SD, where Art Shell was yakking with Randy Moss on the bench, and Moss had to point to the field to remind Shell that we was still coaching a football team. Give the points.
INDIANAPOLIS 13 Houston 47 - 13 is another big spread, but the Colts at home are a pretty tough matchup. They have some fatal flaws (like the running game) but none that Houston will be able to exploit. Give more points.
CINCINNATI 10 Cleveland 42 - And here we go again - 10 points in week two? The Browns will get better every week, as RAC's coaching takes hold, Willie's leadership makes a difference, and Frye gets more comfortable in his role. Take the points and the Brownies, but Cincy still wins.
MIAMI 6½ Buffalo 37 - Buffalo looked good on the road last week, and Miami looked dreadful against Charlie "Football Magic" Batch. I'd like to get a whole TD here, but I'll settle for 6.5 and take the Bills.
CHICAGO 9 Detroit 32 - Can Chicago's offense score 9? Detroit held their own with Seattle last week, but now they're on the road. I think there are some over-reactions in these high spreads, so I'll take the points again with the Lions.
Carolina 1 MINNESOTA 37½ - But here's the other side of the coin. One point for Carolina? Everybody's Super Bowl darling? Give me the Panthers.
PHILADELPHIA 3 N.Y. Giants 41½ - Can Philly do it against a good team? I thought the Jints looked good last week and had some bad officiating help out the wrong Manning. Philly has trouble at RB and WR. I'll take the FG and the Jints.
ATLANTA 5½ Tampa Bay 35½ - Is Tampa as bad as they played last week? That's what the bookies are asking with the line - between a TD and a FG. I'll give the 5.5 and take the Falcons at home because I think they're handling Vick better, and their D is improved.
New Orleans 2½ GREEN BAY 37½ - The Aints favoured at Lambeau? There has to be something deeply wrong with this picture. Yes, the Pack is a Division II team right now, and the frozen tundra isn't what it once was. Still. I'll take the 2.5 point - having absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Favre and Ahman Green are both on my fantasy team.
St. Louis 3 SAN FRANCISCO 43½ - I think this line is too small - thwe Rams will be better this year. The 49rs showed some offense against the Cards, but it won't be enough against the Rams D which should be solid.
SEATTLE 7 Arizona 47 - The Cards are improved for sure, and will continue to get better. Dennis Green is a for-real coach and Arizona is turning into Minnesota West. But Seattle is the defending conference champ for a reason, and they're home in rainy Seattle, so I'm willing to give the TD and take the Hawks at home.
NEW ENGLAND 6 N.Y. JETS 37 - Pats in a romp. Belichick shows Mangini how it's done. And when the other coaches get this game tape, they'll know exactly how to stop Pennington & Co.
SAN DIEGO 11 Tennessee 38 - Yet another double digit line. But for San Diego at home, it's warranted. Give the 11 and take the Bolts.
DENVER 10½ Kansas City 39½ - Yee gads - 10.5 points for the Donkeys? What madness is this? Herm Edwards must have done something seriously wrong. It may be that the New York betting dollars want to go against KC because Herm stabbed them in the back. Still, the line is too high - take the points and KC to cover, but the Donkeys will win.
Of course, I stu[pidly forgot that professional manequin Todd Collins will be starting at QB for KC after Trent Green got aced last week. Duh. I might still take the 10.5 and see if Harm can rally the troops.
DALLAS 6 Washington 36½ - There are a lot of people on both teams' bandwagons, which mean a lot of people will be let down. I think the Tuna is not happy with his whole situation now - Jerry Jones got a bag of TO groceries without Bill's consent. Both teams look very 8-8 to me. But Washington loves to spoil the party at Texas Stadium, so I'll take 6 and Washington.
Monday, Sept. 18
JACKSONVILLE 1 Pittsburgh 36½ - Jax sure looked good against Dallas, and the Steelers weren't too convincing on opening night. Without the big Doofus at QB, take Jax and sacrifice the point.
posted by fiduciary at 10:56 AM
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