Monday, November 21, 2005

First Reptile

"Dishonest and reprehensible." Dick Cheney said that, and he was not talking about himself. That's funny, really, because when you think of those two words together, he's the first Cat that comes to mind. Then you get a cascading torrent of images - Georgie, Rove, rummy, Scooter, the list goers on - and then you realize that these reptiles are in charge and then you go back into your normal depressed funk.

People who say Georgie and his pals in the Junta lied their way to the Iraq invasion are "dishonest and reprehensible." Also, patriots like decorated combat veteran Rep. Murtha lack "backbone." My question is this: does Cheney catch his own flies with his tongue, or are they fed to him by federal entomologists?

Because you really can't make the claim that Cheney is one of us. It's not that he's physically insectoid. Clearly, he has no antennae or pincers. It's that his reptile brain is so overdeveloped that it drives not only his word and behaviours, but those of the federal government as well.

In the human brain, there is a region in the brain stem that is pure reptile - hearkening back to our lizard ancestors. Yes, that means we evolved from reptilian amphibians. If you don't agree, please return to Kansas where they're establishing a Creationist Land of Oz.

In your lizard brain reside your most base instincts. When presented with external stimuli, you are driven to eat it, use it for procreation, kill it, of flee it. The rest of our brain is devoted to higher functions that modify these reactions, leading to things like civilization and society.

Not so for Cheney and the Junta. They are controlled completely by the direct, unaltered instructions from their lizard brains. So when the prospect of fighting in Vietnam confronted them, the lizard said: "run!" When the big oil money cane calling, the lizard said: "procreate!" When pushing for an easy self-serving invasion of Iraq came - and there was no prospect of personal harm - the lizard said: "fight!"

No part of the brain stem said "plan," or "evaluate," or "consider," or "discuss." Those are higher brain functions that don't have a voice in neocon schemes.

Everything the Rove/Cheney Junta has done (or attempted to do) has its root motivation in simple lizard thinking. Their ideology is grown from the basest animal (pre-mammalian) instinct.

So if you really want to understand your neocon masters, call a herpetologist.

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